Tony Alarcon was caught off guard when he looked at his phone to see that his daughter’s school was calling him. As he figured out that he was actually called in to pick up his daughter from school, he thought there was a misunderstanding going on. To let it go, he was too upset; he had to do something about this case.
A Normal Day
When Tony Alarcon dropped off his daughter, Demetra, it was a hot morning like any other for school. It was already reaching nearly 90 degrees outside in the morning, so naturally, Demetra wore an outfit that would make her comfortable in this scorching heat.
A Normal Day
No School Uniform
Demetra was a student at Raymond J. Fisher Middle School. Her school did not have a strict dress code, so students could wear whatever they felt most comfortable during their classes. There was also a kind of dress code to ensure that students dressed properly every day for school.
No School Uniform
Protective Dad
As a real estate agent and a well-known investment banker, Tony Alarcon knows how to speak to people and how to fight for his customers. He is not one to back down from anything that he believes in so deeply, and his teenage daughter, Demetra, is particularly protective.
Protective Dad
Embarrassed
Demetra was called out in front of the whole class by her teacher on this day at school. She wasn’t the first girl to experience something like this before, but that didn’t make it less embarrassing. Everything she wanted to do was sink into the seat and lay her head down. She was unable to accept that this was happening to her.
Embarrassed
Inappropriate Outfit
With the outfit that she was wearing, Demetra did not see anything wrong. In the terrible heat, they were feeling, it was light, comfortable, and breathable. She didn’t think it was inappropriate for her blue romper, and her dad dropped her off at school, so he clearly didn’t think about it either.
Inappropriate Outfit
A Huge Clash
Demetra was not trying to wear anything inappropriate; during a heatwave in California, she just wanted to wear something that would protect her from sweating and overheating. She certainly did not know that her choice of the outfit of the day would lead to such a feud between her father and the school.
A Huge Clash
Such A Fuss
All in the school soon enough learned about what happened to Demetra. Not only this, but local news outlets have found out about what this school had done and began publishing stories and news clips. There was one question stuck in everyone’s minds: what was Demetra wearing that was so different or so much worse than what other girls were wearing at school?
Such A Fuss
Unforeseen Outcome
In Los Gatos, California, she didn’t think anything would ever come from her wearing a breaker to school on a swelteringly hot day, but she couldn’t have been more mistaken. Something she never expected was what happened to her at school because of her dress.
Unforeseen Outcome
Unnecessary Humiliation
This super hot day didn’t start the way Demetra figured it would. In her first class of the day, she was called out by her instructor and humiliated in front of the entire class. He was the one who said her outfit was not suitable attire for school.
Unnecessary Humiliation
Principal Gets Involved
After humiliating her in front of her classmates, he sent her to the principal’s office for further examination. The principal called Tony, Demetra’s dad, after seeing what Demetra was wearing at school, and said there was a situation and needed to come in. He didn’t think he would later regret the call.
Principal Gets Involved
A Choice To Be Made
Tony was told by the school principal that Demetra’s outfit was not appropriate to wear in school and that he had two choices: either he could bring her some new clothes to change into, or he could come right now to pick her up from school. He was unable to believe what he was saying!
A Choice To Be Made
Playing Along
Tony took a deep breath and said he would change clothes to school for his daughter. He began to sift through all the clothes in her wardrobe and decided to bring her an outfit he found suitable for school. He placed a pair of denim shorts and a tank top in his car and drove them to her school.
Playing Along
The Battle Is On
Demetra picked up her dad’s clothes and went to a private room to change her new dress. Her dad and principal were waiting in the office for her, but the principal said the outfit was still inappropriate when she came back out. The body of Demetra was hidden. What was the problem? Tony was beginning to get mad now.
The Battle Is On
The Problem
Demetra picked up her dad’s clothes and went to a private room to change her new dress. Her dad and principal were waiting in the office for her, but the principal said the outfit was still inappropriate when she came back out. The body of Demetra was hidden. What was the problem? Tony was beginning to get crazy now.
The Problem
Protecting His Daughter
There had to have been something else to this story that Tony didn’t know, and he needed to find out what it was. He wouldn’t back down from getting an answer until he got one that he knew was the truth. He was skeptical about why his daughter had been picked out, but he hoped the school would be better than that.
Protecting His Daughter
He Wasn’t Satisfied
The school principal told Tony that it was not really about his daughter’s actual modesty, but the fact that her outfit was just too short. It didn’t pass what he called the ‘fingertip test,’ and she couldn’t wear it for that reason. For a minute, Tony did not trust him that this was actually what was happening.
He Wasn’t Satisfied
Even Angrier
Tony was becoming even more upset after hearing about the explanation. He knew they were lying to him, and they were making an excuse! When he dropped Demetra off for class, he saw girls wearing identical outfits that were just as short that very morning. He knew something else was there. Why was it that his daughter was picked out?
Even Angrier
The Fingertip Test
It is a way for the school to see if an outfit is an acceptable length if you have never heard of the ‘fingertip test’; they check this by making students put their hands around their sides and stand up straight. They are not permitted to be worn in school if the student’s arms stretch longer than the trousers’ length. The hands of Demetra went past her trousers. Tony was livid; he wasn’t going to put up for it.
The Fingertip Test
The Truth
The school principal acknowledged, after a few minutes of debating back and forth that the real reason Demetra was picked out instead of treating everyone fairly was because of some of the boys in her class. Tony thought for a second that he had misheard, so he asked him to repeat it. He could not believe what was just said by the principal!
The Truth
Regret
When the principal saw Tony’s reaction, he realized he had made a wrong turn and said something he wasn’t supposed to do. Tony would not let this go and the principal regretted saying it at all. The reason Demetra was unable to wear what she wanted and what she felt comfortable in was that she was a diversion from the classroom boys.
Regret
Disbelief
While sitting face to face with him, opposite the principal, he simply could not believe what he heard right now. If boys get distracted, it is not his daughter’s fault, and she shouldn’t be punished for wearing clothes that she is happy in. She was singled out by both the principal and the teacher, and Tony was ready to fight back.
Disbelief3
Using Resources
Tony knew he couldn’t let this situation go, especially after seeing the look on Demetra’s face and seeing her struggling to fight back tears. Many red lines were crossed by the things the principal was saying about Demetra, and Tony was not going to let this go without fighting for what was right.
Using Resources
Last Choice
Once again the principal was offering Tony two options to choose from. He said either Demetra was willing to wear sweatpants to cover her legs or she was not allowed to go back to school. Tony knew this was a completely unreasonable ultimatum, especially after realizing that the rationale behind this was because boys were getting distracted. He had determined how he wanted this war to be waged.
Last Choice
Unfair Discrimination
In this case, Demetra then began speaking for the first time. She pointed out the fact that girls in school were only so strictly followed by the dress code. There was no hat policy for boys, but all of them still wore hats all the time and were not reprimanded for it. The only ones to get in trouble were the girls, which is highly racist.
Unfair Discrimination
Many Others
Tony was trying to keep his cool, but the more he thought about the situation, the more difficult it was for him to do so. He clarified that this morning he saw a lot of girls wearing outfits such as this one in the parking lot, so he couldn’t figure out why his daughter was the only one to be called out.
Many Others
Unrealistic Rules
In the least, asking girls to wear long pants on a day when it’s so hot outside was not realistic for the school, only because boys get distracted looking at them. When they go outside, wearing lighter or shorter clothes leaves them more relaxed in class and not overheating. If boys get distracted, that’s not the fault of the girls.
Unrealistic Rules
Students Agreed
Tony thought he should ask Demetra’s friends what they were thinking at their school about this dress code policy. Both of her friends decided that the policies of the dress code were unjust and that girls should not have to sit uncomfortably in the heat in class only because boys can not concentrate in class. This situation was absurd.
Students Agreed
Involving The Media
Contacting media outlets was the next step Tony wanted to take. For several reasons, he was angry because he wanted to know that the awful dress code of this school made his daughter weep and made her and her friends unhappy. On Today and other local news outlets, Tony agreed to go to talk.
Involving The Media
Parents’ Decision
He had a very direct and concise response to give them when the media began contacting Tony to get his opinion on what the school’s dress code should be with which any parent will possibly resonate. He said that what kids wear to school should not be up to the school; if parents feel comfortable sending their children to school in anything, then it should be appropriate. It should not be at the mercy of the administration. We think that’s fair!
Parents’ Decision
Proposal
Tony came back to the school with a big proposal; he wanted improvements to the dress code of the school to be made. Some of the modifications included that there should not be visible panties, no midriffs showing, and no spaghetti strap tops. This was just the beginning of the problem for him, however.
Proposal
Bigger Issue
Most parents were completely supportive of Tony at school, but not everyone felt that way. It was no longer a hidden secret that girls were objectified at school for what they wanted to wear, but people were concerned that if adolescents were given full reigns over what they should wear to school, that turmoil would ensue.
Bigger Issue
The Accusations
When Tony brought his ideas to the school, they said that the dress code was intended to create student guidelines and that their overall aim was to provide ‘fair decorum’ among the students at school. They seem to have dealt with this problem before; while this might not be the first case, we hope it’s the last one.
The Accusations
More Cases
Demetra isn’t the only teenage girl who has had a problem with the dress code rules of her school. When she was picked out in a large group of people for what she was wearing and how the school felt the outfit was presented, Clare, a 17-year-old teen, was going to her school prom.
More Cases
The Perfect Dress
For a long time now, Clare and her boyfriend have been looking forward to prom night; they were so excited about it that they even made sure they bought their tickets well in advance. Clare found the perfect prom dress after a lengthy search. As she pictured, it was silver and sparkly, and she thought that nothing could ruin their night.
The Perfect Dress
The Dreaded Fingertip Test
She knew she had to buy it when she saw a dress which caught her attention and realized it was in her price range. The dress also had to pass the notorious fingertip inspection, sadly. She tried it, set her arms down on her sides, and she wanted the best.
The Dreaded Fingertip Test
Prom Dress Code
The dress code for dresses to be fingertip-length or longer was very specifically written on the prom invitation. It was only long enough for Clare’s dress to pass the test, and she loved it so much. If she had any idea what sort of problems it would give her, however, she would not have bought it.
Prom Dress Code
It Was Time
Finally, it was prom night for Clare. She could hardly contain her excitement, and she put her dress on as the finishing touch to getting ready. She had a problem this time; her dress was too short, and the finger-tip test failed. She was all dressed and ready for the prom, but she didn’t know what to do with her outfit.
It Was Time
Being Cautious
She put on her shoes before she left the house to see how the dress would look all together. The dress ended right at her fingertips, and she was worried that the dress would get too far when she started dancing, and then be too short to wear.
Being Cautious
Confronted
Someone came to her immediately when Clare arrived at the Methodist church where the prom was taking place, and made a statement about her unacceptable outfit. Although she checked her dress several times before entering the door, she was still pulled aside by someone. So she actually asked someone to repeat to her what the rule was.
Confronted
Looks Can Be Deceiving
Ann Duncan, the organizer who spoke to Clare, advised her she wanted to obey the guidelines set out and comply with the fingertip law. Clare tried to reassure her that the dress really complies with the law, but that her legs are long, so the dress looks much shorter on anyone else than it does.
Looks Can Be Deceiving
Wouldn’t Budge
Even so, Ann kept arguing that Clare’s dress was clearly too short to wear inside but Ann had no choice but to allow her to go into the dance after Clare showed her that it was actually appropriate. However, this wasn’t the end of Clare’s experiences that night.
Wouldn’t Budge
Inconsistent Rules
As Clare made her way into the dance room, she found that several other girls were wearing dresses that were just as short, if not shorter than hers! She couldn’t help but chuckle at the situation and just think about the ridiculousness of it. She wanted her prom to be celebrated, but then she found something going on above her.
Inconsistent Rules
Inappropriate Staring
Clare and her friends could not help but note that the room had far more chaperones than in the last few years. On top of that many of the chaperones were some students’ dads, and they were all looking down at all the girls coming into the room from the balcony. The girls were all starting to feel dissatisfied with what was happening.
Inappropriate Staring
Uneasy Feeling
It’s very understandable that these girls all felt a little awkward looking at them all night long with so many parents in the room. They even understood why they were there. They were all there to try to introduce the dress code; they were all in the room to chart the dresses of girls to make sure they weren’t too short.
Uneasy Feeling
Getting Called Again
Ann was once again working her way toward her shortly after Clare joined the dance. She caught Clare’s arm and dragged her off the dance floor, where she told her she was dancing too provacuously for the fathers’ likes. They were worried that their dancing would lead their children to think impure thoughts.
Getting Called Again
Unacceptable
Telling a girl that her outfit and dance moves were causing boys to have unpure thoughts is the same thing as telling someone that they asked for something bad to happen to them. Clare felt angry and uncomfortable; her actions could not after all, be held as the justification for these fathers and their sons to think about these things.
Unacceptable
Enough Is Enough
Clare began to fight back against Ms. Duncan by claiming that she wasn’t even dancing, and she was helped by all of Clare’s friends. She then went on to show Ann, once again that her dress actually met the specifications of the dress code. And still, Ann didn’t have it. This is when the boyfriend of Clare jumped in to help.
Enough Is Enough
A United Front
Clare’s boyfriend wasn’t going to put up with what Ann was telling them, so he said that if she tried to kick Clare out of the prom, everyone in her group of friends was going to leave, too, and they were going to press for their tickets to be reimbursed.
A United Front
Not Enough
Clare was far too angry and ashamed to believe that it would make up for this terrible night merely to have her ticket expense refunded to her; she did nothing wrong, after all. James, a friend of Clare’s, demanded to talk to the person overseeing the prom. This request made Ms. Duncan angry and wanted to call another chaperone for backup.
Not Enough
Escorted Out
For as long as she could remember, Clare was looking forward to prom night, and all of her hopes of how wonderful that night would be were broken in just a few minutes. As if they had done anything wrong, she and all of her friends were escorted out of the dance. Clare had simply been thrown out of the dance because she stood out and wore something in which she felt relaxed and confident.
Escorted Out